:: Decide Your Path wisely ::

Secret Two

Decide Your Path wisely
The Story of a Man and His Street

That day, I was reading the Internet forum I frequent daily and saw an article posted by a member. The title? Would You Marry You ? My…. Isn’t that an interesting question? I chuckled at the words on my laptop screen. The title was certainly interesting enough to make me sit up immediately, and honestly, I was curious to see how people would respond!

A few minutes after reading the article, I just sat there, with my back against the chair, pondering. The article had asked me to think of all my own behaviors and habits and ask myself this one, vital question:

-If I met a person (i.e. myself) who had this list of characteristics, behaviors, and altitudes, would I marry her ? –

I was supposed to reflect on my current behavior, and this is the key: not the behavior or the character I wish to possess in the future. The evaluation period is now, current, present and at-this-instant behavior.

I began pondering. This method is excellent. Hmm…Would I marry me?. Surprisingly, I found my honest self saying, “Maybe,” instead of, “Definitely,” or “Of Course!” So, I then asked myself what things I should do to help me to changed my answer from a maybe to be a definite yes? And, so, I started creating another list.

This method is so great that I decided to use that same line of questioning on myself for other things, too, like : Would I befriend me ? Would I trust me? Would I love me? Would I boss me? Would I student me? Or, maybe even: Would I daughter me? Okay, I know the last three sound a little bit weird, but I think you know what I mean, right?

To make it more understandable, you can rephrase the question in another format: would I take me as friend? Would I trust a person like me? Would I love a person just like me? Would I wan to work with someone like me? Etcetera. Hmm….

I was quite amused by the answers I gave to each of my question, The results confirmed that I am only human (duh!), with many weaknesses (double duh) – and I could definitely benefit from someone behavioral changes. Definitely, I smiled while looking at the honest-to-goodness list about myself as I realized that this article was about change. Improving oneself. Making the effort. Transformation. Alteration.

It presented a lovely method for self-assessment of our current character and everyday behavior. No multiple-choice question and a list of mismatched answer to tell us who we are. Just one question, and we do our own thinking for the answer.

Allah, our Creator, has told us the importance of taking responsibility for our actions:
(To any of you that chooses of press forward, or to follow behind-Every soul will be (held) in pledge for its deeds.) (Al-Muddaththir 74: 37-38)

Subhanallah. We will all be asked by Allah to account for our individual actions, and the most important thing will be that we are responsible and accountable for them. Responsible and accountable. Two words that give me sleepless nights….

Remember this Hadith:

‘Abdullah ibn ‘Umar narrated that the Messenger of Allah said, “Everyone of you is a guardian and is responsible for his charges. The ruler who has authority over people, is a guardian and is responsible for them, a man is a guardian of his family and is responsible for them; a woman is a guardian of her husband’s house and children and is responsible for them; a servant is a guardian of his master’s property and is responsible for it; so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your charges”. (Al-Bukhari and Muslim)

Because of the above Hadith, I know in my heart that I must change the modify anything within me that is inconsistent with my DEEN (religion), because, one day, I will be questioned by my Lord. This has made me realize something profound. Just imagine, my name being called out in front of the whole of mankind, everyone from Adam to the last man born, all eyes looking at me… then, all my wrongdoings made public and shown to everyone. How awkward, how embarrassing and how humiliating it would be. I don’t think I could face that. I don’t think I could. Just thinking about it makes my knees tremble. Astaghfirullah. Forgive me, My Lord…

I need to save myself from all those possible humiliating moments. I know that I need to change whatever is not good within myself, bit by bit. It is going to take some time. But, I have to do it.

I remember and advice of my beloved Prophet (peace be upon him):

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said : “Whoever, among you, sees something abominable should rectify it with his hand; and if he has not strength enough to do it, then he should do it with his tongue; and if he has not strength enough to do it, (even) then he should (abhor it ) from his heart, and that is the least of Faith. ” (Muslim)

I have always heard this Hadith being using by Muslims when analyzing the behavior of others. I feel, however, that the advice from my Prophet ( peace be upon him) can best be applied to one’s own behavior.

He (peace be upon him) said that, if we something abominable, we should rectify it with our hands. Hands, according to the scholars, refer to actions. So, if I discover that there are things in me that are not good, shouldn’t I also apply this hadith to myself?.

I believe so. Yes, this means that I should modify whatever behavior is not desirable, right? Change it with my hands. Change it with actions-actions that would help alter my current behavior to new one consistent with what Allah wants.

I know I have to do it myself, because Allah has said in the Glorious Qur’an what can be translated as :

( This is because Allah has never changed o favor which He has conferred upon a people until they change their own condition; and because Allah is Hearing, Knowing. )(Al-Anfal 8 : 53)

Unless I change my own behaviors with my own actions, they will remain the same. Allah will not change them for me, if I, myself, refuse to change what I do, or who I am, right now. It is all up to me. It is so obvious, so clear. Change myself, or else I will never changed. Allah says He will never changed anyone until they change themselves.

But, then, Allah told me that if I do actually turn to Him, then He would give me this…

(Turn towards Allah, O believers, every one of you, so that you may be successful.) (An-Nur 24: 31)

Ahh… Success! It is among my favorite words, really.

I love this ayah (verse). It has one simple guideline that allows us to become successful in both this world and in the Hereafter. The word “so” in “so that you may be successful” sounds like a guarantee. Like, drink so that your thirst is quenched. Eat so that your hunger is gone, Study so that you pass the exam. Follow Allah so that you can become successful. A guarantee from Allah! Want to change ? Turn to Him. This is what our Lord said.

Let me share with you a “micro” mini-book I once read, a super-short story containing five scenes with an analogy worth sharing…

Scene 1 :
I walk down a street, and there’s a deep hole in sidewalk. I fall in. It takes forever to get out. It’s not my fault.

Scene 2 :
I walk down the same street. I fall in the hole again. It still takes long time to get out. It’s my fault.

Scene 3 :
I walk down the same street. I fall in the hole again. It’s becoming a habit. It is definitely my fault. I get out immediately.

Scene 4 :
I walk down the same street and see the deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it.

Scene 5 :
I walk down a different street.

Cute, right? Finally the narrator walked down a different street. This story I beautifully written as it is very simple and direct. And I love its simplicity. Despite that, it carries with it a fundamental guideline for change…

This story made me think of some things that I have faced in my life. How many times must I fall into the same hole? Twice? Thrice? Think about it. Wouldn’t I come out as someone who never learns, someone who is dense, silly, or unintelligent, if I kept falling into the same hole, over and over again?

What about you, my dearest friends? Think about something that you have always wanted to change. And ask yourself, honestly: which scene are you in right now, and what should you do to make sure that you get to the last and final scene?

Think about the street you are walking on now. Is there a hole in which you keep falling in and end up hurting yourself? Why do you still fall in, despite knowing of its existence? Why is it so hard for you to walk around it, or maybe even use another street?

So, my pals, this is the deal. If there is a hole on the street you are currently on, move to another scene, or, better still, change the street you are walking on. Failure to do so will put you at risk of hurting yourself if you fall hard Either way, you need to decide and make the change. Be brave. Be hold. Make the change that will make you successful. Make the needed change for the sake of Allah. Walk on another street.

Remember, my dear friends, Allah promises. Not me. Not your parents. Not your friends. Not your boss. It is the promise of our Creator, our Lord, the Most Powerful.

Change. Turn towards him. And be successful.

Is there anything better for us in this life than His promise?

From book : Life Is An Open Secret
Writer : Zabrina A. Bakar